Separation Preparation | For the Holiday Season

Nov 21

Written by Rachel Angrisani
November 21, 2021

With the holidays right around the corner, many families are gearing up for a couple of weeks of fun and relaxation. Some are eager to welcome extended family and friends from out of town, while others can’t wait to take that well-deserved vacation as a family unit. With all of this excitement, there is something that often comes right along with it: changes in routine. For our littlest kiddos, changes in the flow of day-to-day life can be tougher than we might think.

Something that parents might observe during times when the normal routine is disrupted (even for wonderful reasons!) is their child becoming less secure around separation, even if they have fully and successfully separated before.

They may be more clingy to the people who make them feel most secure, and sometimes the transition back to school after the holiday break can be hard because of this. We’re here with a few tips for creating routine in the hustle and bustle of the holiday season to hopefully make the transition back into the post-holiday “regularly scheduled programming” just a little easier.

Tip 1 | Talk It Out

We may take for granted that our little ones understand that the busyness and changes during the holiday season are only temporary. It can be helpful to have a conversation with them about what they can expect before routine begins to change, and check in with them periodically throughout the couple of weeks that things feel different, so that they have the opportunity to let you know how they’re feeling, ask questions, or just feel seen and heard. A visual cue, like a large calendar with images representing upcoming events, can serve as a reference point for your little to look to if they are feeling uncertain.

For example, if you are having extended family visiting for a week, you could sit down with your child and explain to them that there are going to be family members staying at your house, show them on the calendar when they will be coming, and when they will be leaving, and explain anything that will feel different during that time.

Sample language:

“Aunt Jess and Uncle Mark are coming to visit! While they are here, your sister will be sleeping in your room. That will feel different but it will be a lot of fun! Should we count on the calendar how many days they will be here?”

Tip 2 | ‘A’ For Effort In Consistency

There are going to be some things that are out of your control during this wonderful and let’s face it, sometimes chaotic time of the year... and that’s ok! Simply making an effort to keep even just one thing consistent can be hugely beneficial for the little ones in your life. Bedtime routine is something that can usually be replicated no matter where you are. If the usual run of show is bath time, two stories, and a good night song, try to incorporate this routine each night, so that even if other things feel unpredictable for your kiddo, they know they can count on that!

Tip 3 | Easing Back In

It can be helpful to keep in mind that we may need to give our little ones a bit of grace as we wrap up the holiday season and head into the new year. The first few days of school drop-off may be a little tough from a separation perspective, or you might see some behaviors emerge that aren’t typical for your kiddo. Even just anticipating that things may be a little “off” for a few days can help in approaching the situation with compassion, and leave space for all of the big feelings that small people often have.

To recap . . .

With the upcoming hustle and bustle of the holiday season, try these few tips to prepare for separation post-holiday season when returning to school programming: